communication

I've been married ten years now and I'm far from an expert on communication, but I do think there are a few things that you should NEVER say to your spouse so that there is at least potential for some level of peace in the home.

I was reading thru ephesians 5 (the best teaching on marriage in scripture) and tried to think of ways I can be a better listener and communicator.

Here is my list of things you should never say to your wife---

1. "I'm sorry, what was that? I wasn't really listening" --Showing interest and focusing on her when speaking is paramount, Jon, turn off the basketball game!!

2. You always (fill in the blank) You never (fill in the blank)--these two words "never" help. Use "i feel like sometimes" even if you think its all the time, you have a much better chance of being heard

3. "your overreacting!!" Even if that's true, she's never going to admit that on the spot. Something like "I don't blame you for being upset, Let's try to fix the problem" will go a lot farther.

4. "you know that was a lot better when my mom made it a few weeks ago" Never criticize cooking and never compare to mom!! Watch for flying objects after this one.

5. "Of course I know your birthday!! It's on....(any pause at all here to think and you're dead......RIP)

6. "have you seen that commercial for the slim sauna belt designed to get rid of saddlebags?" Again, watch for UFO's if you go there.

7. "Happy anniversary, I didn't have time to go to the store but I sent you an E-card, check your junk-mail" ---Fail.

8. "Honey, I was just trying to tidy up the bedroom, is this a fitted sheet or your underwear?"--not good.

9. "are you sure you're really ready to deliver? Last time my feet got really sore standing by the bed that whole time"--pretty much any comments made during pregnancy and especially toward the end will prove detrimental to your health and future.

10. " I think the bathroom scale is measuring at least five pounds light"

Maybe this will help, prolly not. I'll post what women shoulnd't say to husbands too if I can think of any.