Finding Jesus

If only Mary and Joseph had been a little more tech savvy, the shepherds wouldn't have needed a star. Apparently theft and vandalism of nativity scenes is on the rise and some homeowners and churches have had enough! You can now outfit baby Jesus and the rest of the gang with a gps tracking devise so that christmas hating atheists can be hunted down and brought to swift justice!! I'm sure law enforcement in America is going to drop everything when the A.P.B. of missing baby Jesus hits the radio waves.

I can remember this irreverent behavior happening when I was a kid as well. A neighbor would put out her nativity scene and every year it would be down at least one wiseman or shepherd. I thought Jesus was being raised by a single mom for a while when somebody ran off with Joseph. This wave of crime is godless and despicable and I for one love this idea. There should be a minimum ten acts of random kindness as well as a 15-year mandatory jail sentence for first offenders. Community service should include knocking on neighborhood doors and singing yuletide carols in German.

Anyways, at least Ricky Bobby can sleep well tonight knowing that baby Jesus is safe and sound. Kendra and I have ours encased in plexiglass surrounded by an electric fence and barbwire. Not as pretty as I hoped, but I'm not taking any chances. What is wrong with a country of people that would steal Jesus? I'm not sure I want to know.