The power of a dad part 2

I remember being about ten years old and playing with a kid who lived up the street. His name was Kevin and we were in my back yard pretending to be army soldiers. Suddenly, and without warning, one of us (I'll blame Kevin) came up with the idea that no soldier worth his salt goes into battle without grenades. Since we had a giant walnut tree in our backyard, there were no shortage of hand bombs to be thrown. Through the process of war, the grenades morphed into smoke bombs that we threw into the garage to confuse the enemy. Unfortunately for me, we decided that could only be accomplished by throwing the walnuts through the windows into the garage. Problem was, the windows weren't open, so each one was systematically shattered in order to engage this unseen enemy. After a heated battle, the imaginary adversary surrendered, and every single garage window was busted out. I'm not sure when it dawned on me that this private war would ultimately end up in defeat for me, but I remember staring at the broken glass and walnut shards and wondering how my dad the military police of the home would respond. Kevin conveniently went a.w.o.l and retreated back to the safety of his house, leaving me alone to face the prospect of being dishonorably discharged into next week by my dad. That may have been the first time prayer became real to me=)

Here's the moral of the story.........Kids do foolish things. The bible even tells us that foolishness is bound in the heart of a child (prov. 22:15) and we can expect them to act in ways that is not always logical. I don't remember exactly what my dad said when he came home that night, but I'm sure it included the phrase......"WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!!!" My response.... " I DON'T KNOW!!!! THE ENEMY ENGAGED US FIRST? or something along those lines=) I know that my dad was far from happy, but he never made me feel stupid. We swept out the garage and I knew my allowance would be permanently frozen, but it wasn't as bad as I thought......(or as bad as my loving sisters assured me it would be=)

I believe a successful father is one who can correct his children's foolishness without inflicting emotional damage. The purpose of discipline should always be redemptive in nature and never punitive. Everything must be looked at as an opportunity to have a teachable moment. How you respond to the foolish behavior of your children will determine whether or not you get the desired result. Here is the first key..........

1. Make sure you reject your child's behavior, without rejecting the child.

Too many men respond to foolishness with physical and verbal abuse that causes the child to feel like they're stupid or a failure. This can leave scars on children for life that affect them long into adulthood. It is impossible to yell or scare away foolishness with a knee jerk outburst, in fact, it will actually imbed the foolish nature even deeper and leave lasting scars of rejection. I'm certainly not saying that I never get frustrated and loose my cool, or that children shouldn't be held accountable, but to be successful you must give loving acceptance to the child while correcting the foolishness of the behavior. Remember that along with foolishness, every child also has tremendous God given potential unique only to them. We have to look for ways, especially in the area of discipline, to cultivate the character of God and His virtues into our children. Through that process, as they grow, they can now begin to walk in the wisdom of God.